To feed or not to feed

When T was born 19 and a half months ago, both boys were being home-schooled (and that was pretty much a full time job) so we knew it may well be a bit of a juggling act fitting a new baby into that.

For that reason, I didn't have high hopes about breastfeeding for very long. I didn't have any kind of timeframe in mind beyond the first few weeks. I was prepared to switch to bottle at any point that we needed to in order to keep the household ticking over and making sure J and D's routines were not disrupted.

I had breastfed J and D until around 10 months, but imagined stopping a lot sooner with Miss T. But once again I found it proved easier to be able to just have the milk supply at the ready rather than having to be super organised and prepared with formula and bottles. So a few weeks turned into a few months and we carried on. I didn't take the ability to breastfeed for granted at any point as I've mentioned before. Even with Miss T, because I had gestational diabetes during pregnancy, when she was born, they needed to top up her feeds with formula for the first 24 hours and so again, I realised that it was a privilege to be able to breastfeed her and not to be taken for granted.

Before we knew it we got to a year. At around a year, lots of biting meant I questioned whether to carry on. But being able to read blogs with other peoples experiences and being encouraged by sources of support like Boobiemilk's Breastfeeding in England blog, we managed to get through that phase of biting and carry on.

Now T is over 19 months old. For the past 4 days she's missed her morning feed. (She had cut down to just a morning and evening feed since around a year). It happened by accident the first day as she woke up late and we had to rush out to get D to school in time. Then we missed the second day as she didn't ask for 'milk' and then I wondered if we could miss another day.

So I think we have dropped the morning feed. But she is still feeding in the evening. Now I'm questioning whether it is time to stop? Is there any benefit to either of us carrying on just the evening feed?

It may be coincidence or it may be down to breastfeeding that she has not had nearly as many bugs or illnesses as the boys had by this age and that makes me want to carry on. But at the same time, I am beginning to want to get back to being totally myself too. So I'm left with this: To feed or not to feed, that is the question.